


Truth, Reason and Love

by captainkippen



Category: Ackley Bridge (TV)
Genre: Angst, Bisexuality, Coming Out, I have no idea where I'm going with this I just know it's gonna be super gay, Love, M/M, Romance, Slow Burn, Underage Drinking, mentions of abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-18
Updated: 2018-08-15
Packaged: 2019-06-12 16:09:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15343542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainkippen/pseuds/captainkippen
Summary: It takes one kiss for Cory's whole world to be turned upside down.





	1. Not with the eyes, but with the mind...

It's been a few days since the kiss in the changing rooms, and Cory is forced to admit to himself that he perhaps handled things badly. Naveed is avoiding him to the point he won't even look him in the eye at school, and he doesn't know how to fix it. He didn't mean to handle the situation so badly, but he's not exactly sure how he’s meant to react when one of his best mates kisses him five minutes before what could be described as potentially one of the most important rugby games of his life. They didn’t even have time to actually talk about it before they were interrupted by Mr. Bell... and then, of course, Cory went and broke Riz's neck on the field, which obviously didn't help matters.

Naveed probably thinks that he’s a psychopath now. God, maybe he is a psychopath. Who the hell deals with stress by breaking their mate's neck? Obviously Cory hadn't intended on injuring Riz, but if he'd taken a moment to calm down maybe it wouldn't have happened. It's one thing to be caught off guard by a kiss, it's another to let it stop you from thinking straight completely.

It was just a kiss. It doesn't matter.

It wasn't even that good of a kiss, Cory thinks trying to ignore the fact that sounds like a lie even to himself.

He sighs and stares up at his bedroom ceiling, watching as a small spider crawl across it slowly. He hasn't felt this alone in ages. It's weird with Naveed not talking to him and Riz still in the hospital. None of the other lads text him as much as those two, and he misses the buzz of his phone as it sits silently next to his bed. Downstairs his dad is laughing loudly at something on the TV, and that just makes him think of what else is missing. Jordan has been gone for days, and he's nowhere to be found. He doesn't want to be found. Not even by his older brother.

What a shitty week. He's stuck with one of his best friends not speaking to him, the other is in the hospital in a halo brace because of him, and his brother is missing because he couldn't protect him like he should've been able to. It's like he can't do anything right, and now he's got nobody to even talk to about it.

He and Naveed talk about pretty much everything these days. Or at least he thought they did.

He hadn't even realised Naveed was gay, which somehow makes it all feel worse. How did he miss his best friend being gay? That's the kind of thing somebody notices, right? Naveed always knows what's going on with him. He asks after Jordan, checks in on how things are going at home, and he reassures Cory that everything's going to be okay in the end. Has Cory been that focused on himself that he didn't even notice something as important as his best friend having a crush on him?

He picks up his phone and stares.

Eight. That's how many messages he's sent Naveed in just the past couple of hours. Naveed hasn't even opened them, like Cory's texts aren't even worth a read. Cory can't really blame him, he wouldn't want to talk to himself either. He opens the conversation, but can't bring himself to type out another pointless message. It started feeling pathetic after he'd sent the fourth. Now it was just sad.

What's the point of life if you don't have your mates to distract you from your own emotional bullshit?

He didn't used to have this problem, and now he actually feels like he's lost something important without either of them to talk to. At least Riz had forgiven him. He doesn't know what he'd do if he hadn't. While it still feels like shit to know he hurt him in the first place he can't help feeling relieved that he hasn't managed to completely blow their friendship, but as for his friendship with Naveed...

Well, Naveed would tell him he hasn't blown this, that he's not going to blow this. That's what he'd say if he was speaking to him. If Cory could just show Naveed everything was okay, that they could still be good mates, then everything would start feeling better.

Cory falls asleep thinking about Naveed's hands on the back of his neck and the look in his eyes as he told Cory to believe in himself.

 

*******

 

The next day Cory feels like he’s floating in a haze. He barely registers the other lads when they greeted him with wide smiles and fist bumps. It feels wrong without Naveed and Riz by his side, and by the time they’ve all shuffled outside to wait for Mr. Qureshi’s tree planting ceremony he’s more or less left standing by himself. He spots Naveed quickly. He’s stood a few feet away with Nasreen Paracha looking miserable. Cory tries to catch his eye, but Naveed only looks up briefly before looking away. A wave of disappointment fills him, and for a brief moment, he even gets a lump in his throat, which is stupid because he’s not about to cry over something as childish as his friend not speaking to him, so Cory looks away too. It’s just for a moment, but when he looks back Naveed has melted away into the crowd and no longer in sight. 

He's in Science when Riz finally texts him back. The relief that fills him is a momentary reprieve from everything else, and Cory grins as he reads the message about Hayley Booth giving Riz a “sorry your neck got broken” blow job. Riz doesn’t often talk about stuff he’s done with girls, and Cory’s not sure if it’s due to a lack of action on Riz’s part or he’s just shy. He doesn’t seem shy now, in fact he seems quite happy for Cory to tell the other lads in their group chat. Which he does, promptly. After all, this is the kind of thing the lads like to talk about. It keeps them occupied for weeks, gossip like this. They never notice anything else that's happening when they have girls to focus on.

For a moment Cory wonders if he should tell Riz about Naveed kissing him, but he dismisses that thought almost immediately. Naveed probably didn’t want anyone to know, he hadn’t even told Cory he was gay beforehand, and besides the lads didn’t want to hear about two boys kissing - that would be weird. It didn’t even mean anything.

 

*******

 

They get in trouble for the texts later. Hayley’s older sister Missy is fire and fury about the all the jokes, and Cory knows they’re in shit the second he sees the look in her eye. All the lads in the group chat are pulled aside during break the next day for a lecture about harassment from Mr. Hyatt. Naveed is just in front of Cory, but he’s still ignoring him and it still hurts.

“Sir, this better be worth it,” Cory complains loudly. If he can’t get Naveed’s attention in private maybe he can get it here. If he just acts like everything’s normal, maybe Naveed will go back to acting like normal too. While Mr. Hyatt talks Cory leans forward and punches Naveed lightly on the arm.

“Not much point you being here, is there?” He teases quietly, but Naveed barely looks at him and proceeds to lean forward further out of Cory’s reach. Cory taps him again, but Naveed just gives him the cold shoulder in return, and he sits back dejectedly in his chair.

The room feels suffocatingly small now, with all the lads crammed in making stupid jokes while Mr. Hyatt still talks.

“Are we done, sir?” Cory asks, raising his voice again. He regrets it when Mr. Hyatt gives him a sharp look, and it’s the first time Cory thinks he’s ever seen the man seem genuinely angry.

“No, we’re not… because while it might seem harmless banter to you other people are getting hurt by it.”

Shame curls in Cory’s gut and his defense slips past his lips before he can even think to stop himself. “We’re just having a laugh.”

“It’s harassment,” Mr. Hyatt rebukes. “And it shows you up to the be little boys that you are.”

Cory wants to disagree with his teacher, but he can’t help but feel small again when he looks at the way Naveed is sat hunched over and angled away from him. His teasing was meant to fix things, not make them worse.

 

*******

 

Later, when Mr. Bell corners him to ask him if he’s seen Jordan, Cory truly starts to feel alone.

“Some brother I am, eh?” He says with a half-hearted smile at the ground.

“What?” Mr. Bell says, frowning. “Whoa. This is not your fault. Listen, I know you’ve had a tough couple of weeks but… I’m always here.”

He knows Mr. Bell means well, and he’s grateful for it, but his words just remind Cory that he’s alone at the moment. What does it say about Cory when only a teacher actually seems to care?

Well, that’s not entirely true. He knows Riz cares, but he can’t be here right now. And he knows Naveed must care because he spent the last few weeks before Cory fucked everything up constantly asking Cory if he was alright. If he were here now he’d punch Cory in the shoulder and tell him not to worry, that they’d find Jordan.

“Cheers, sir.” He walks away quickly before Mr. Bell can ask more questions or check in on how things are at home.

There is no one to punch him in the shoulder and tell him everything's going to be alright right now.

 

*******

 

Naveed looks beautiful in his Puck costume. Cory hadn’t been all that enthusiastic about being involved in the school production of A Midsummer Night’s Dream originally. He’d only auditioned because he’d promised Naveed he’d do it, in exchange for Naveed trying out for the rugby team. Now though, on the opening night, it all seems worth it.

Cory does not stare at Naveed… he’s only looking because he misses him, alright? No other reason. Although, it is hard to ignore someone covered head to toe in blue paint, especially when the blue paint is covering their naked torso. It’s not just Cory that’s looking though, it’s fine. Everyone’s complimented Naveed tonight. Cory watched him thank people with smiles that didn’t quite reach his eyes. He wants to make Naveed smile a genuine smile… he has so many smurf jokes ready. If only Naveed would actually look at him.

When Miss Keane makes them hold hands in a circle Cory holds his hand out to him, and Naveed avoids it like the plague. The rejection feels even worse than the cold shoulder and quickly dropped gazes Naveed’s been giving him lately. Cory’s thinking about this so hard that he misses most of Miss Keane’s inspiring speech, only tuning back in when she yells happily.

“Go out there and smash it, go on!”

The cast cheer and the circle disbands, everyone heading for the stage. Everyone except Naveed, who is heading quickly out the door. Cory knows it’s now or never and follows him.

“Where are you going?” He says.

Naveed stops walking, his back tenses up at the sound of Cory's voice, but he doesn’t turn around to face him.

“Can’t do it.”

Cory frowns. It’s not like Naveed not to be like this. He’s usually so cheerful and confident. The tone of his voice unsettles Cory.

“‘Course you can,” Cory says. “If we don’t have a puck we don’t have a play, do we?”

“What do you care?”

The words are so much more cutting than Cory expected. It feels like a punch in the gut. How can Naveed not know he cares about him? They’re best mates, aren’t they? I mean, sure they’re not talking right now, but that doesn’t mean Cory wouldn’t still die for him. They’re best friends.

He doesn’t say any of this, instead, he leans back against the wall and says “Yeah, well I’m here aren’t I?”

Naveed finally turns around. He doesn’t look angry or upset now, just cautious.

“Thought you hated me?” He asks, confused.

Cory almost laughs in relief. Hate him? Cory Wilson hate Naveed Haider? Impossible. This entire time he’d been worried that Naveed hated him, not the other way around.

“‘Course not,” He elbows Naveed gently. “You’re a muppet. I was just winding you up, that’s all.”

“I’m sorry about… what happened,” Naveed doesn’t meet his eye, and Cory looks down at his feet to swallow.

He’s not sure what to say. What can he say? Naveed kissed him and he asked him what he was doing. Naveed kissed him and he went outside and broke Riz’s neck. Naveed kissed him and as hard as Cory tries to ignore it the memory of his lips on his keeps replaying in his head. He can’t say any of that, but Naveed looks like he’s bracing himself for rejection all over again and so he plasters on his cheekiest smile and says the only thing he can think of that will break the tension.

“So you think I’m fit, eh? You and everyone else in this school.”

Naveed finally smiles. Cory cheers internally.

“You’re not gonna tell anyone, are you?”

Cory’s first thought is to be offended that Naveed would think he’d tell anyone, but after the recent problems with telling the lads about Riz and Hayley, it probably wasn’t too surprising that this was what Naveed was worrying about.

“No. Course I won’t.”

Naveed nods, visibly relieved. Cory grins and thinks back to Mrs. Keane’s earlier words.

“Now you get in there and you smash it, a’ight?”

As they fistbump Cory revels in Naveed’s smile. The rest of the evening passes in a blur of Shakespeare and questionable acting. When Cory gets into bed that night he feels lighter, and he thinks of Naveed’s happy smile when they made up. He can’t stop himself from texting him.

**To: Naveed**   
_You did great tonight, Papa Smurf._

**From: Naveed**   
_Shut it, horse-face._

He falls asleep smiling that night and dreams only of blue-painted skin.


	2. and reason panders will

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cory is swimming in a pool of denial and terrible decisions.

_Warm air surrounds him as he floats through gentle nothingness. Fingers trace along his skin, lips against his ear, and a content sigh escapes him. When he opens his eyes it’s Naveed that's looking down at him with the beautiful wide smile he wears so often, pressing him back into a soft mattress, rolling hips against hips…_

_Cory wakes with a start. It's the middle of the night. He's alone in his room, his old lumpy mattress is poking bruises into his back and the cold air of a house that's lost its heating is biting at his exposed skin. He rolls over and tries to ignore the lingering feeling of someone else pressed up against him, but it takes him hours to get back to sleep._

 

*******

 

Life continues as bleakly as normal in Ackley Bridge. Jordan’s still missing, their dad is still awful, and Riz still has to wear a halo brace, but with Naveed talking to him again Cory starts to find it a little bit more bearable. It’s not quite the same as before, Naveed doesn’t touch him as much and they haven’t talked about the kiss since before the play. It’s not that he misses Naveed touching him, but the absence of his hand on his shoulder every so often or their arms brushing together as they walk side by side makes Cory realise that he doesn’t actually get touched all that much. He gets handshakes and fist bumps, and he sometimes wrestles with the other lads, but it’s not the same as the casual affection Naveed used to show him. Half-drunk fumbles with girls down the rec aren’t nearly as reassuring as a pat on the back from your mate. Okay, so maybe he misses the touching a little bit.

“Cory!” A ball of paper hits him on the forehead. People around him laugh and he looks up to see everyone looking at him. He’d been too busy staring out of the window to even remember he was in English class.

“Oi, no throwing things in my classroom.” Miss Keane admonishes with a smile before turning back to Cory. “It’s your turn to read, Cory.”

Oh. He looks down at the book in his hands. They’re studying Romeo and Juliet at the moment. He doesn’t dislike it, but after A Midsummer Night’s Dream, he’s had enough of old English that he can’t actually understand. He has no idea what page they’re on or what he’s meant to be reading. His classmates watch him expectantly.

“Sorry, Miss.” He says, plastering on a wide grin. “Got distracted by your beautiful face.”

Miss Keane rolls her eyes. “If you’re done being cheeky we’re on page seventy-six.”

Naveed nudges him, pushing his own copy of Romeo and Juliet forward and pointing at the lines.

“You alright?” Naveed whispers, once Cory’s finished reading and Miss Keane goes back to talking about the various ways in which you can analyse the scene they’re studying.

“I’m fine, just got distracted.”

“You worried about Jordan?”

Cory shrugs. He’s worried about a lot of things, but he’s not about to go and drag everyone else into his problems.

“Don’t worry,” Naveed says. “He’ll come back. He’s got to… he’ll be missing you.”

“Don’t think I’m a good enough brother to miss.”

Naveed makes a disapproving noise and opens his mouth to respond, but he’s quickly interrupted by Miss Keane turning around to raise an unimpressed eyebrow at them.

“Cory and Naveed do you have something you want to share with the rest of us?”

“No, Miss.” They say in unison.

“Then stop nattering and listen.”

“Sorry, Miss.”

 

*******

 

“How did you know you were gay?”

It’s lunchtime and Naveed has been cracking jokes about everyone who walks by their table for the past five minutes now. Usually, Cory would be laughing along with him, but he’s decided they need to talk about this before he goes crazy as a result of avoiding the topic. The word gay makes Naveed’s eyes grow comically wide and dart around the room quietly.

“Shut up,” He hisses, ducking his head. “Not so loud.”

“No one’s going to hear us.”

The other boys who usually sit with them are all either still in the lunch queue or in break time detention.

“Why do you want to talk about this?” Naveed asks. “We don’t need to talk about this. I said I’m sorry.”

“Look, you don’t need to apologise. I’m just curious, mate.” Cory says. “It’s like… an important thing, right? I feel bad that I didn’t realise or something. You’re one of my best mates.”

“Really?”

Cory thinks Naveed has no right to look as surprised as he does. They spend literally all of their time together.

“‘Course, you muppet. I just think I should’ve figured it out, but I thought you liked Nasreen and all. You went out with her, didn’t you?”

For a moment Cory thinks Naveed is going to start laughing, but he just shakes his head and takes a sip of his drink before looking back up at Cory with an amused smile.

“Just ‘cause you’re best mates with someone doesn’t mean they can’t have secrets.”

“Why didn’t you tell me, though?”

“I mean… I sort of did,” Naveed points out awkwardly.

“I mean with words! Like… before that and stuff. Why didn’t you just say something?”

“Well, we don’t exactly live in the most accepting town, do we? The lads make jokes about it all the time.”

He makes a good point. Ackley Bridge isn’t the best place to be gay, and it must be even worse when you’ve got a bunch of idiots for friends. Cory feels stupid all of a sudden for not considering how hard it actually must be for Naveed.

“You know it’s alright though, right?” He asks.

“What are you two whispering about?”

The two of them straighten up quickly. Cory hadn’t even realised they moved so close to one another. Riz stands before them looking slightly awkward in his brace, but still cheerful.

“Well, well, well look who it is!” Cory greets him loudly. He and Naveed stand up to help Riz slide into a seat carefully. “We’ve just been planning your welcome back party is all. What you doing here, mate? I thought your mum said you had to stay at home.”

“Yeah well dad finally convinced her to let me go, didn’t he? Being at home was getting well boring, she wouldn’t even let me play FIFA. I think she was driving him a bit mad too, acting like I’ll break if I breathe too hard.”

“Can’t have been too bad,” Naveed jokes. “What with Hayley and all.”

“Oh, don’t even,” Riz says warningly. “I got such a bollocking for that.”

“She was well happy with them flowers though,” Cory says. “Pretty smooth. You’re finally learning.”

“Oh, shut up. It’s your fault I were in the doghouse in the first place. If I didn’t know better I’d think you were trying to kill me. Breaking me neck, getting me in trouble and all.”

Riz and Naveed laugh at Cory’s feigned expression of offence.

“Oi, I said I was sorry didn’t I?”

“Yeah, well you can make it up to me proper by giving me your crisps.”

Cory rolls his eyes but throws the bag of Walkers over to him anyway. It feels good to have both Riz and Naveed back with him. He watches happily as the other lads join them, welcoming Riz back with stupid jokes about his brace and loud laughter. For a moment it feels like Cory’s been holding his head under water and he can finally breathe again.

“Anyway, turns out breaking your neck is actually well good for some things,” Riz is saying as they’ve all settled down to eat. “Mum and dad are going away soon, and they’ve said I can have a few friends over.”

There’s a chorus of excited yells. A few friends over almost always equates to a full-blown party more or less, and they all know how big the Nawaz’s house is. Cory is actually quite surprised - Riz isn’t usually this bold.

“What about Alya?” Cory asks.

Riz groans. “You’re not going to try and ask her out again are you?”

“Wait,” Naveed interrupts. “You’ve asked out Alya?”

“Yeah and he gotten mugged right off didn’t he, lads?” Zain says.

The boys laugh, but Cory waves them all off.

“It was ages ago,” He says to Naveed, then turns back to Riz. “Nah, I just mean like won’t she tell your parents if you throw a big party? She’s not exactly the party type, is she?”

“I’ll deal with her, don’t worry.”

Riz looks so sure of himself that it makes Cory absolutely certain that this is going to go very very wrong, but he can’t bring himself to care that much. The past few weeks have been the worst of his life if he’s honest with him, and he’s not sure how to fix a good chunk of his problems. He needs a good break from everything, and it’s the perfect chance to get smashed, get on the pull and forget the world exists. Plus he hasn’t properly gotten off with anybody for ages.

His mind flashes back to Naveed’s lips on his, and he looks up to see Naveed looking at him.

You alright? Naveed mouths at him.

There’s an odd feeling in his chest. Cory takes a moment to marvel at how Naveed always seems to notice when something is wrong as if he’s right there in his head with him. He always checks in on him, even now after everything. It feels like he wants to forget about the world a little less than he did before.

Cory nods back at him and digs into the terrible school chips in front of him. He definitely needs this party.

 

*******

 

When Mrs Carter tells Cory that she's found out where Jordan is there’s a moment in which he almost doesn't believe her. He finds it especially difficult to take her news seriously when she mentions in a grave tone that Jordan’s not only been tricking elderly people into letting him use their showers but has been spending his time playing pool with Mrs Carter’s actual father. It seems impossible. Cory hadn't even considered the fact Mrs Carter would have parents, let alone a dad who'd spend his time playing pool with messed up teenagers. Really though, the more he thinks about it the more it seems like exactly the kind of situation that Jordan (and Jordan alone) could get himself into.

On their way to find him Cory bites back roughly six thousand questions, most of them to do with the look that had been on Mrs Carter's face when she mentioned her dad before. It was a look that reflected the way he felt when he spoke about his own dad. He’s never given much thought to his head teacher before. He doesn't dislike her the way he knows some of the students do, and even though he's mildly confused by the interest she and Mr Bell show him and his brother he can admit it's pretty nice. He'll even admit she seems to know what she's doing most of the time even if she does manage to piss half the school as she goes, but until this afternoon he's never felt there was any level of actual understanding between them.

Now though, sitting anxiously in a small car coupled with her fingers tapping unsteadily on the steering wheel, he's starting to realise they might have a bit more in common than he first thought.

“Do you have any siblings, Miss?” He asks.

She glances at him briefly, then shakes her head.

“Only me, my dad and… and my mum.”

“Are you close?”

The look she gives him suggests they both know he already knows the answer to that. They lapse back into awkward silence for a few moments before she speaks again.

“You know we were only trying to help before with Jordan, right?”

Cory knows. He knows because he still feels a hot flush of shame every time he thinks of having to ask for that help, of having to admit to Mr Bell what his father had been doing to his brother, of actually losing control so badly that he broke down.

“It’s not your fault, Miss.”

She looks at him, but he keeps his eyes trained firmly on the streets rushing by outside. He doesn't want to see the pitying look he knows is there in her eyes.

“It’s not your fault either, Cory. You do understand that don't you?” She sounds so concerned and for a brief aching moment it reminds him of how his mum used to talk.

He shuts that thought down the second it crosses his mind.

He would have thought he'd be more relieved when they finally found his brother, after all it’s been weeks and Cory’s lost more than a little sleep over him, but seeing Jordan again only makes him feel a little sicker than he already did. He's happy to see his brother hasn't gone back to selling drugs and isn't lying dead in a ditch somewhere, of course, but knowing that he's actually spent the past few weeks having to trick people into giving him good and bouncing between the sofas of various strange old people just reminds Cory how much he's failed at his job of being an older brother. A sixteen-year-old should not be out on the streets fending for himself. A sixteen-year-old should not feel unsafe in his own home. Cory should have fought harder for Jordan to be allowed to stay, or maybe he should have fought harder with his dad in general. He could have stepped in all those times their dad raised a fist, could have taken the beating instead of Jordan, but he didn’t. He just stood there like an idiot - completely useless.

Obviously, he doesn't say any of this to Jordan, instead, he just puts on a cheerful smile and ruffles his hair. The car ride back is no less tense than the car ride there, and even with his brother back at his side things still feel uncomfortably off-kilter.

 

*******

 

To the shock of absolutely nobody (except for Mr Simpson maybe) Naveed gets grounded the night of his parents finding out that he's been lying about studying at the library in favour of performing at stand-up nights. He's been doing his comedy gigs for a few weeks now with extreme encouragement from all of the lads and he's actually pretty good. Cory never thought he'd enjoy spending nights hanging out in the community centre with a bunch of bored middle-aged people, but seeing Naveed do what he loves is always worth it. Plus it's a good laugh.

The grounding definitely kills the laughter. Without Naveed to text Cory is forced to resort to annoying Riz with constant messages instead, and it doesn't look like that will be changing anytime soon.

“How long?”

“Until I'm at least thirty, probably.”

It's break time and Naveed’s explaining to all the boys how his parents have not only grounded him but also decided that his friends’ are a bad influence and he's not allowed to see them anymore.

“But you're seeing us right now,” Riz points out.

“No, he's not,” Cory argues. “We’re all illusions.”

“Driven mad by boredom,” Naveed agrees. “Seeing things, aren't I? It's a living nightmare, looking at your ugly mugs all day.”

He laughs as they pelt him with chips. Cory’s surprised to see him so cheerful, especially after seeing Mr Haider’s face as he dragged Naveed out of the hall the night before.

“Does this mean you won't be able to go to Riz’s?” Jake asks.

“I can't even leave my room without getting told what a disappointment I am, and you think I'm gonna be able to go to a party?”

The hot anger that flashes through Cory startles him. It's not like Naveed missing the party is the end of the world, but the prospect of him not being there feels weirdly unbeatable. He shakes his head.

“Nah, mate. You're definitely going.”

Naveed raises his eyebrows at him. “Oh I am, am I? And how do you s’pose I get past my prison guards exactly?”

“Leave it to me,” Cory says. “I’ve got a plan.”

 

*******

 

When implemented Cory's plan goes a lot better than he'd actually believed it would. Part of that is down to the fact that Naveed is a lot more willing to climb out of a second-floor window than Cory ever thought he would be, though he feels like maybe he shouldn't be surprised seeing as Naveed is mischief personified. The rest is down to the fact that at some point this week the boys all seem to have been blessed with an unbelievable streak of luck.

He goes to get Naveed at nine, skipping pre-drinks a the rec with the others to make sure Drunk Cory doesn't fuck things up. It doesn't take much to distract Naveed’s parents, and from his hiding place in the bushes listening to them argue with a delivery man at the door about a pizza they definitely did not order is quite amusing. They don't even hear the loud thump and groans that are a result of Naveed landing not quite as gracefully as intended. By the time they’re on their way to Riz’s Cory is in the best mood he's been in for months. Naveed’s parents hadn't caught them, and there was no one to stop them from having a wild night out. Not even Alya.

A few days ago at dinner, Riz had slyly mentioned that he was going to go and visit his grandparents while his parents were away for the weekend. Not wanting to be one-upped by her brother Alya had immediately decided she would also go. Then much to Alya’s annoyance, at the last minute, Riz had backed out claiming that his back and neck were still aching and he felt he should stay home and rest. Strangely she seems to have fallen for it, which, when they were told about by Riz, was something that the boys have all deemed suspicious. Riz keeps reassuring them all that it's probably because she's sick of having to do stuff for him and wants to go back to being the centre of attention - an easily achievable feat where his grandparents are concerned. Apparently, Alya’s always been the favourite.

Despite the Nawaz family home being big enough to play home to an entire town, by ten o’clock it’s almost completely full. When Cory and Naveed finally arrive they're already at least four drinks behind everyone else, this is a fact that Cory is determined to fix as soon as humanly possible.

“I've never been to a house party before,” Naveed says, staring at the masses of people as they navigate their way through the endless halls.

The look of wonder on Naveed's face would be funny, but Cory understands. There are people at the party he’s never seen before, despite the fact that Ackley Bridge isn't a very big town in the first place, and he suspects he'll never see half of them again.

“They're not usually this big,” He replies. “I guess everyone wanted to see how the other half lives.”

That’s another thing that Cory wholeheartedly understands. Riz’s home never ceases to amaze him. It's more of a mansion than a house, and it feels too big for such a small amount of people to live in. It has its own indoor swimming pool for crying out loud.

“C’mon.” Cory plants his hands firmly on Naveed’s shoulders and steers him down the hall. “Let's get something to drink.”

The kitchen is just as crowded as the rest of the house, though a little less rowdy, and they elbow their way towards the fridge. Cory has to pause when he opens it to find what is frankly an insane amount of drinks left unguarded, but he grabs a couple of Smirnoffs with little guilt over it. If you're dim enough to leave your drinks where others can get them at a party then you deserve to have your drinks stolen. The owners are probably going to be too drunk to notice any missing in the first place. He hands one to Naveed and digs a bottle opener out of his pocket, popping the cap off his own bottle and then trading with Naveed to open the second one. It’s hard not to stare as Naveed tips his head back slightly to drink. His shirt hangs off his shoulder slightly leaving his neck and collarbone exposed invitingly. Cory tears his eyes away and takes a long swig out of his own bottle.

Unfortunately for him, trying not to stare becomes a theme for the night. Naveed’s party outfit is wildly different from his school uniform or the smart shirts and ties he wears for comedy gigs. He’s dressed in tight white jeans and a light blue t-shirt that reminds Cory just how good his Puck costume had been during the play. He’s also pushed his hair up out of his face, carefully styled in a way Cory isn’t used to seeing. It’s a particularly eye-catching look, and Cory comforts himself with the thought that he’s definitely not the only one who’s noticed. Already a few girls from the year below have come over to chat, and they all seem very appreciative of Naveed’s new look. It makes something twist in Cory’s stomach, and he excuses them both with a cheeky smile and a gesture to the doorway. Naveed comes willingly, nattering obliviously about the new theory he has that Riz’s dad might actually be a mob boss.

They head for the living room where all of the furniture has been pushed to the side to create space for a makeshift dance floor. It’s overflowing with teenagers all either sprawled on the sofas by the walls or dancing clumsily to the loud grime music blasting from speakers.

“I’m surprised no one’s suffocated to death yet,” Naveed says.

“Give it time.” Cory pats him on the back and heads into the fray.

He starts off aiming to find a girl to dance with, which isn’t actually that difficult but he keeps getting distracted making sure Naveed is still there with him. The girls from the kitchen have joined them. One of them - a short, blonde and pretty year eleven that he thinks he can remember slapping Jordan once - presses in close to Cory as they move, giggling in that way that means she’s going to laugh about this with her mates later in the toilet, and while Cory would love to focus on the inappropriate way her hand is sliding down his side his eyes keep catching on Naveed’s carefree grin which steals his attention entirely every time.

Occasionally one of the boys will appear to greet them and shove increasingly disgusting drinks at them, which doesn't help matters at all. The drunker they get the more Naveed giggles, the more ridiculous his dance moves get, and he becomes more willing to lean in close to say things right in Cory’s ear. Each time Cory feels his breath on his skin a tingling feeling shoots all the way through him and he has to fight back the urge to shiver.

After a little the heat from the room becomes unbearable. He taps Naveed on the shoulder.

“You want another drink?”

“Nah mate, think I’m good for the moment.”

“I do,” The girl dancing with Cory pipes up. He thinks her name might be Lauren.

“I’ll be right back then,” He says with a wide smile and backs out of the room.

The hallway is less crowded now. People seem to have decided to brave the colder and head outside to the deck. He leans back against the wall, closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He should be having more fun than he is. He should be planning where to sneak away to with Lauren so they can do some things that she can tell her friends and he can brag to the lads about. Instead, he feels like he’s drowning a little bit and he’s not sure why.

Like the hallway, the kitchen has emptied out a bit by the time he ventures back in there. The remaining people, however, appear to be setting up a game of Ring of Fire. A couple of his own friends are involved, and they look excited when they realise it’s him. It doesn’t take long for him to give in to their invitation to join the game. The problem with this is that Cory is terrible at drinking games, terrible to the point that it’s become a joke the lads like to tease him for, even in games that just require luck over skill. He thinks it might be one of the universe’s ways of laughing at him but at this point that could just be his entire life.

This means, of course, that Cory picks up the last king. He watches in resignation as they all pour the remnants of their drinks into one cup. The resulting dirty drink looks absolutely foul, but he’s not a quitter and he’s not going to be beaten, so he just laughs and takes it.

“We like to drink with Cory,” Neil starts singing. Cory groans, he hates this chant. The others join in instantly. “‘’Cause Cory is our mate! And when we drink with Cory he downs it all in 8…”

He lifts the cup to his lips and begins to chug.

“7, 6, 5, 4…”

It’s disgusting. It’s truly one of the worst concoctions he’s ever put in his mouth. It makes his stomach churn on impact.

“3, 2, 1! Ayy!” They all cheer as he slams the empty cup back onto the kitchen counter.

He staggers back laughing and bumps right into Naveed.

“Thought you’d got lost,” Naveed jokes as he steadies Cory. “Impressive display. You having fun?”

“Too much fun,” Cory lies. “Let’s go dance again.”

“I think maybe you should sit down for a minute, mate,” Naveed suggests kindly.

Cory shakes his head adamantly and pulls away to head for the living room.

“Don’t be a killjoy,” He calls over his shoulder as he pushes his way back into the dancing mass.

He doesn’t want to admit to himself that he feels a slight twinge of disappointment when he turns around and Naveed’s not there.

 

*******

 

At some point later that evening Cory finds his way back to Lauren. At another point, even later in the evening, Cory finds himself stumbling up the stairs with her. She’s got her hands on his fly and her lipstick is across his lips in a way that he knows he’ll get teased for later if he forgets to wash it off before he sees the boys again. They’re in Riz’s room by the time she’s stepping back and frowning at him, and Cory realises he’s not even a little bit hard.

“What, am I not fit enough for you or something?” She says.

Cory shakes his head. “Must’ve had too much to drink.”

His stomach seems to agree with him then, rolling unpleasantly.

“Don’t you like me?”

“I do, it’s just-”

A sudden lurch of his insides has him covering his mouth quickly.

“It’s what? You think you’re too good for me or something?”

She’s drunk and angry. He’s drunk and almost definitely about to throw up. He opens his mouth to defend himself again, and it’s immediately apparent that it was the wrong decision to make. He’s barely managed to process the sight of his sick on Lauren’s shoes before she’s slapping him and storming out. Her exit doesn’t even properly register, he’s more focused on rushing into Riz’s bathroom.

Riz and Naveed find him leaning pathetically over the toilet. He feels like he’s dying, and he says as much.

“If you do does that mean I’ll be the only rugby captain?” Riz asks, leaning against the door. “‘Cause that’d be nice. Less of a chance of me getting my neck broken that way.”

Cory flips him off, but the effect is ruined by another wave of vomit surging up his throat. Riz sighs.

“I’ll get the kitchen roll.” He disappears again.

The inside of the toilet bowl becomes especially fascinating when Naveed sits down next to him, leaning against the cool white cupboards with a concerned look on his face.

“Don’t,” Cory warns.

“Don’t worry,” Naveed says. “I’m not here to be the fun police.”

Cory winces.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to sound like such a dick earlier.”

“It’s fine,” Naveed shrugs. “You’re a dick every day.”

Cory tries to kick him, but can’t quite reach with the position he’s in, but the resulting laugh he gets from Naveed for his efforts is worth it.

“What’s going on with you, man?” Naveed says, suddenly serious.

Trust him to wait until Cory can’t escape to turn on the Adult Conversation Mode.

“Nothing.”

“I don’t believe you. You’ve been weird all week. At first, I thought it was because of like… the gay thing. But then everything seemed normal for a bit. Then I thought it was about Jordan, but he’s safe now and all but you’re still... yeah.”

Cory lets out a deep sigh. It feels like he owes him an explanation now, but he doesn’t even know where to start.

“I don’t know,” He answers lamely.

“Don’t know or don’t want to tell me?” Naveed asks. “‘Cause that’s fine and all if you don’t, but like… let me know you’re okay at least.”

Cory sighs and pulls back from the toilet to lean his back heavily against the bathtub and look Naveed in the eye.

“I don’t know,” He answers truthfully. “But I’ll let you know when I figure it out, okay?”

“Okay.”

They half smile at each other, and then Riz reappears in the doorway brandishing a roll of Bounty and a big glass of water. He shoves the latter at Cory and makes him drink, watching like a hawk.

“Usually you know how to handle your drink,” He remarks.

“Ring of fire,” Cory says as a way of explanation.

“Yeah, Neil said he reckoned that’s what did it.”

He groans. “Does everyone know?”

Both of them nod at him.

“Lauren Parker is absolutely fuming,” Naveed says. “Apparently they were new shoes.”

“Monday’s gonna be fun.”

“It’s fine,” Riz says. “Apparently Luke Mitchell walked in on his girlfriend with one of his mates in the bathroom. You cockblocking yourself will only be like the third most talked about thing at school. Also, if you ever try to fuck someone in my room again I will actually murder you.”

That seems fair. Cory nods.

“Noted.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Thanks for all the lovely comments so far. This definitely isn't my best writing because I don't have a lot of time or a beta reader to tell me I'm being a fool, but I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
> 
> I also just want to reassure people that obviously I don't think any of what's happening to Cory is his fault. He'snot a terrible brother and he and Jordan don't deserve to be treated the way their dad treats them, I'm just trying to write it from his POV.
> 
> On that note, we've recently had episode 8 of season 2 which was absolutely heartbreaking. It dealt with a lot of things regarding abuse, and I'm not an expert on this area, but I'm going to provide some potentially helpful links for anyone who might be struggling with a similar situation/know someone in a similar situation.
> 
> National Domestic Violence Helpline: http://www.nationaldomesticviolencehelpline.org.uk
> 
> Men's Advice Line: http://www.mensadviceline.org.uk
> 
> NSPCC Report Child Abuse: https://www.nspcc.org.uk/what-you-can-do/report-abuse


	3. The fool doth think he is wise...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nasreen Paracha continues to surprise Cory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit of a filler chapter, the draft was longer but I realised it would make more sense to end it at a certain point and use the rest for the beginning of chapter 4.

There are exactly fifteen reasons Cory is certain that he’s straight… the only problem is that these reasons go flying right out of his mind the second he sees Naveed. Last night feels like a weird kind of wake up call to him that something isn’t quite right. When he’d told Lauren he must have had too much to drink it wasn’t exactly a lie, but even at the time it didn’t feel like the entire truth. She’s a very attractive girl, and he likes girls he always has, so why did pulling her feel so much like going through the motions of a chore?

He wakes up on Riz’s bed, head pounding and limbs sprawled across Naveed and Harry who look no more pleased than he feels. Riz is standing by his window, having just pulled open the curtains to let in a flood of unwanted sunlight with a shit-eating grin plastered across his face. Cory might kill him, just because.

“Rise and shine,” He says.

“Fuck off,” Harry gumbles, shoving his head under a pillow.

“This is what you get for stealing my bed, I had to sleep on the sofa you dicks.”

“‘S what being a gracious host is all about, innit mate?” Naveed’s voice is hoarse from disuse and he burrows his face further into Cory’s side to get away from the light. Cory smiles down at him fondly, and when he looks up a moment later Riz is looking at him with one eyebrow raised and an unreadable expression on his face. He thinks Riz might be trying to communicate something with only his eyes, but Cory is too tired and hungover to understand Nawaz-Telepathy right now so he just shrugs and closes his eyes again.

“Well I’m not hosting any more, party’s over. You’re gonna help me clean up.”

Naveed makes a noise of protest and Harry throws his pillow in the vague direction of Riz. It lands miserably on the floor with a soft thump.

“C’mon lads. If my folks come home to this we’re all dead,” Riz reasons. “We can’t have more parties if we’re dead.”

“Think I’m already dead,” Cory says. His dry throat aches as he speaks. He definitely overdid it last night, in hindsight it was sort of stupid to think he could drink his problems away, but he’s a magnet for stupid decisions so it isn’t particularly surprising.

“Then get undead,” Riz says. “Here.”

A roll of bin-bags lands on Cory’s stomach with a heavy thump. He groans loudly. Riz only laughs in response.

 

*******

 

Cory stills feels like death at school on Monday morning, but that’s more from exhaustion and less from drinking. He didn’t get much sleep the night before - thinking about the party had him awake well into the early hours of the morning. By the time he falls asleep it feels like it’s only two seconds before his alarm is going off in his ear. He shuffles to school in a zombie-like daze, and manages to amuse the lads by only answering in sleepy grunts for the first two periods. By break time he’s only slightly more awake, which is maybe why he doesn’t see Mr. Bell coming. He catches Cory after history class. It’s not like Cory is avoiding him or anything, but he’s not really in the mood to talk about his feelings at the moment.

“How you doing?” He asks, pulling him aside. It’s break time and all Cory wants to do is take a nap, the probability of which is quickly fading the more he looks at Mr Bell’s concerned expression.

“I’m alright, Sir,” Cory shrugs.

Mr. Bell isn’t convinced.

“You sure? Ms Carter told me what happened with Jordan. You know being in care might actually be good for him. It means you don’t have to keep worrying as well, can focus on yourself for a bit. Focus on rugby and passing your exams, yeah?”

“Yes, Sir.”

He frowns.

“You sure everything’s alright? You look dead on your feet.”

“I’m fine.”

“Well… if you’re sure…” Mr. Bell looks like he’s about to leave, and the words blurt out of Cory’s mouth without his brain’s permission.

“Howdidyouknowyouwereinlovewithmisscarter?”

Mr. Bell stares at him, baffled. “What?”

Cory takes a deep breath. There’s no going back now.

“How did you know you were in love with Miss Carter?” He says again, at a normal speed. “Like how did you realise?”

“Um…” Cory’s clearly caught him off guard. “I’ve never really thought about it. I just knew, I guess. She makes me happy, no one else could make me laugh like her… this conversation isn’t really appropriate for school. Why’re you asking?”

“Just curious.”

Mr. Bell looks like he doesn’t really believe him, but he lets him off anyway.

“Make sure you actually get some sleep tonight, yeah? Miss Keane said you practically fell asleep in English this morning.”

 

*******

 

During the week that follows, the school canteen becomes a stage for the most recent Ackley Bridge drama. Sam Murgatroyd stands up on a table and declares her lesbianism in front of everybody. Naveed seems to switch between amusement at her outburst and anxiety at the idea of having a slur scrawled across his own forehead in sharpie. Obviously, Cory would never let that happen to him, but he understands the fear. In the wake of this event there are suddenly posters for an LGBT Support Group pinned up all over the walls. Cory is absolutely certain that the teachers have lost their minds with this one - he knows Miss Keane means well, but it’s not like anyone is going to show up. There’s only one gay kid actually out at school, and she’d been shoved out of the closet by a group of homophobes.

Nevertheless, Cory rips down one of the posters when nobody’s looking and shoves it at Naveed when he sees him in the hallway.

“You gonna go?” He grins, bopping Naveed on the head with it.

Naveed grabs the poster from his hands and punches him in the shoulder with an unimpressed look.

“Obviously not. Imagine if my parents found out, I’d be a dead man.”

“You never know, maybe they’d be alright with it.”

“Nah, you haven’t heard the way my mum talks… she’d disown me.”

Cory drops it. He expects Naveed to throw the poster in the bin, but he crumples it up and shoves it in his pocket instead.

“What you doing after school, then?” He asks, nudging him as they walk towards the science block.

“Uh… serving more time at the Haider Family Prison For Disappointing Sons. Still can’t believe they didn’t catch me sneaking out the other night, can you imagine how much shit I’d be in?”

“We’d all cry at your funeral.”

Naveed snorts. His smile makes Cory’s stomach feel fuzzy, and he mentally berates himself for having emotions. “Meet you after class, yeah?”

 

The tragedy of science classes is somehow, despite regularly ignoring his homework, Naveed had ended up in Triple Science while Cory took BTEC. He thinks maybe he’d understand balancing chemical equations more if the class was fun, and had Naveed in it, but then again they’d probably just muck around and get separated. That had happened in three other lessons now.

After class Cory lounges against a wall in the hallway, watching people trickle out of Mr. Hyatt’s chemistry room one by one until they’ve all gone and he realises Naveed still hasn’t come out. Did he not go to class? Cory frowns to himself and heads to the door, peering in through the little glass panel. For a moment he thinks it’s empty, and then he spots Naveed leaning against a table chatting to Nasreen Paracha.

There’s a weird flutter of something akin to jealousy inside him, but then he firmly reminds himself that it’s none of his business and Naveed’s engagement to Nas wasn’t real anyway. He pushes the door open slightly, ready to see if Naveed is coming to lunch, but they don’t notice him and he’s caught off-guard by their conversation.

“-do go I might as well write lesbian across my forehead,” Nas is saying.

Naveed’s holding up the crumpled LGBT Group flier from earlier. Cory’s hit by a wave of realisation at her words. Nasreen Paracha? Gay?

“That look’s becoming quite fashionable, I hear,” He jokes.

Nas makes a face. Naveed’s laugh somehow sounds even more jovial than usual, like he isn’t holding anything back from Nas. The feeling of jealous flares up in Cory once again, and this time it’s not because of any previous engagements. Why doesn’t Naveed laugh like that around _him_? He’s his _best friend_ , not Nasreen.

“If we don’t go to that one, maybe we could… make up our own,” She says.

Naveed snorts. “Just you and me?”

Cory watches as they joke together, Nas using a marker pen as a microphone pretending to interview Naveed like they’re on the news. She says something clever that Cory doesn’t really understand, and Naveed’s face indicates that he’s just as baffled by it. She points the microphone-pen at him again.

“My name is Naveed,” He says solemnly. “And, um… I’M GAY!”

He throws up his arms and Nas practically cackles. Cory suddenly feels like he’s intruding. He tries to slip away and gently close the door behind him, but the two of them clearly catch his movement from the corner of their eyes and suddenly they’ve spotted him.

“Cory?” Naveed says. “What you doing, mate?”

Nas looks mildly horrified.

“Um…” Cory swallows. “I was just waiting for you… you coming to lunch?”

“Oh, right.” Naveed grabs his bag and glances at Nas with an unreadable expression. They’re having a conversation with just their eyes and Cory feels like an outsider just watching them.

“Let’s go,” He marches past Cory and out the door, and as Cory catches up with him he does Naveed a favour and doesn’t ask about Nas.

 

*******

 

He gets cornered by Nas on his way out of school. She seems to pop out of nowhere, and suddenly he’s being grabbed by the arm and finds himself tugged into one of the girls’ toilets.

“How much did you hear?”

“What?” He asks, dumbly.

She flicks him on the forehead, hard.

“Ow!”

“Stop being stupid, you know what I’m talking about. How much of my conversation with Naveed did you hear?”

“Only a little bit.”

She flicks him again.

“Ow! Alright, calm down. I only heard you guys joking about, he was meant to meet me for lunch. I’m not gonna tell anyone if that’s what you’re worried about. No need to attack me.”

Her stern expression softens, and she drops her folded arms.

“Oh… alright then.”

Cory rubs his head.

“Do you assault everyone that knows, then. Or are you just not to anyone?” He asks.

“I’m out to my family and stuff,” Nas shrugs, then shoots him a suspicious look. “Why do you care?”

“I’m just making conversation. Not every day I get dragged into a toilet by a lesbian, it’s usually straight girls that do that.”

Nas rolls her eyes. “Oh, I’ve heard. Classy Cory Wilson and bathroom sex - best combination if you want to get the clap.”

“Oi, play nicely I’m on your side here.”

“Right… sorry. Just not used to you being nice really.”

“I’m always nice!”

“Only to Riz and Naveed.”

Okay, so she’s not wrong, but Cory isn’t going to admit that.

“Why are you so nice to them anyway?” She asks suddenly. There’s an edge to her tone that Cory can’t quite figure out.

“They’re my best mates?”

“Hm. Sure, so there’s no other reason you’re nice to Nav?”

He feels like he’s been slid under a microscope all of a sudden.

“Should there be?”

“I don’t know,” She says casually. “Maybe. Y’know… we’re all going ice skating this weekend, if you wanted to come. You can bring Riz too, if you like.”

“What?”

“Me and Naveed. And Missy obviously,” She says. “Haven’t you seen Naveed skate? He’s well good.”

“He’s mentioned it a few times. But he’s grounded anyway, how’s he plan on going out?”

“His mum wants him to start doing classes again, she thinks it’s just that. Doesn’t know we’re going. What d’you reckon?”

“Uh… sure. Alright then.”

“Good,” She says, then starts pushing him towards the door. “Now get out. This is the girl’s bathroom.”

**Author's Note:**

> I have only vague ideas about where this is going but it's gonna be super gay and there's gonna be so much love okay? I wrote a good chunk of this chapter half asleep, it probably shows.
> 
> Let me know what you think so far, you can find me on tumblr @sidcrosbybro


End file.
